Horoscopes for Babies, December 2019

Sagittarius

Nov. 22 - Dec. 21

This month is full of surprises, Sagittarius Baby, so settle in and accept them with an open mind. Soon you will stand in a long line and be handed over to a strange man in a red suit with a fake white beard, temporarily abandoned by your parents and asked to smile for photos. Despite what all of your natural instincts are screaming, you are safe. Surprise, this is your life now. 

Lucky number: 25
Lucky color: cherry

Capricorn

Dec. 22 - Jan. 19

Discoveries abound for you, Capricorn Baby, and wonder is around every turn. White fluffy things are falling from the sky regularly. Inanimate objects and structures are now twinkling in different colors. The dog is wearing sweaters. Your parents eat only cookies now. What a time to be alive.

Lucky number: 11
Lucky color: plum

Aquarius

Jan. 20 - Feb. 18

It’s not what you say, it’s how you say it, Aquarius Baby. Yes, you are in charge of the household, but you’ll get more of what you want if you let others arrive at your decisions on their own. For example, instead of screaming, “MINE!” when the mini marshmallows are being distributed, put on a show when you get one. Make it special with a big reaction and effusive praise. Reward them for their choice and you’ll have as many marshmallows as you want. 

Lucky number: 95
Lucky color: rose

Pisces

Feb. 19 - Mar. 20

The nights are long this month, Pisces Baby, and there’s no getting around it. Cry if you want to, or utilize the time to reflect on your goals. Where do you see yourself in five years? Is your current arrangement aligned with your values? As you ponder, you might realize that the only thing in your way is you.

Lucky number: 44
Lucky color: tangerine

Aries

Mar. 21 - Apr. 19

Your appetite for life is voracious, Aries Baby, and your appetite for food is catching pace. Your recent foray into solid foods has opened endless possibilities and every big person in your sphere will be sneaking tastes to you. Enjoy the texture of mashed potatoes on the roof of your mouth. Gnaw the edges of a gingerbread man. Stick out your finger and witness the miracle of Nana producing a small mountain of whipped cream on it.

Lucky number: 65
Lucky color: heather gray

Taurus

Apr. 20 - May 20

Vigilance is key this month, Taurus Baby, and it’s up to you to sound the alarms. Your brisk morning stroller rides have opened your eyes to what appears to be an invasion of giant balloon-like creatures on a growing number of neighborhood lawns. Point. Shriek. Repeat. 

Lucky number: 1
Lucky color: navy

Gemini

May 21 - June 20

Slow and steady wins the race, Gemini Baby, so don’t be discouraged by setbacks. Yesterday, you took two steps in a row. Today, you can’t even remember how to pull yourself to a stand. Progress is not a straight line. In fact, it looks a lot like the twirly line you drew on the sofa. Take heart. Tomorrow is a new day.

Lucky number: 26
Lucky color: rainbow

Cancer

June 21 - July 22

Networking is the name of the game, Cancer Baby, and first impressions are key. You will meet and greet a steady stream of new faces this month that look alarmingly similar to your own parents. Wear something comfortable that makes you feel confident. Be warm, but not overly familiar. Play a little hard to get. 

Lucky number: 10
Lucky color: mint

Leo

July 23 - Aug. 22

The world around you seems full of extra cheer, Leo Baby, but you’re feeling melancholy. It could be the worship of capitalism getting to you, and then again it could be gas. Either way, you will find profound joy near the month’s end with an empty cardboard box that you rescue from the recycling bin. (Or does the box rescue you?)

Lucky number: 84
Lucky color: grape

Virgo

Aug. 23 - Sept. 22

Practically every day is a pajama party, Virgo Baby, and you are here for it. Why anybody ever wears anything but pajamas is a mystery you contemplate daily. You learn the words “snow day,” and “work from home” and “Thai food delivery.” It won’t last forever, so soak it in and live in the moment.

Lucky number: 71
Lucky color: olive

Libra

Sept. 23 - Oct. 22

The world is upside down this month, Libra Baby, and all the rules have gone out the window. One day you’re reprimanded for emptying the toilet paper roll, the next you’re being encouraged to tear and shred paper from packages. Attempts to understand this are futile. Look for knowing glances from the cat. The cat shares your confusion.

Lucky number: 19
Lucky color: slate gray

Scorpio

Oct. 23 - Nov. 21

There’s something in the air, Scorpio Baby, and it’s driving you mad. The regular soundtrack of your life has been hijacked by repetitive thrums of the same 13 songs playing virtually everywhere you go. Everyone around you seems immune, but take heart--the pa rum pa pum-pumming will come to an end soon. It must be so. 

Lucky number: 8
Lucky color: grass